So for those that don't know the NBA play-offs are well and truely under way and Kobe and my boys are looking good to take it deep into the finals, provided they start playing like they did a few months back.
In honour of this I've compiled a little list of the best NBA related rhymes I could find. Just to quickly explain the arbitrary ranking system here, points are awarded for originality, accuracy and quotability. Then promptly disregarded based purely on which one I like best.
I've also kept it quite current so I don't want to hear any cries about why i left out some unheardmix tape rhyme of Bushwick Bill comparing himself to Muggsy Bogues, OK?
1. "Money long like arms on Alonso Morning" - Dice Raw on The Roots' Here I come
This is made 100 time better by the fact that it comes in the middle of a verse of some of the most random boasts imaginable. The next line is, "Vampire chicks suck from dust till dawnin," brilliant nonsense.
2. "Ni***z will pull heat longer than Shaq's shoes" - Black Milk on Losing Out
I'd like to point out that when it comes to rappers dropping Shaq's name into a verse they're always very clear never to do so by comparing their mic murdering ability to his.
3. "I ordered the Kobe beef like Shaquiel O'Neal" - Kanye West on Back like That (Remix)
Another appearence for the big deiesel here. Only Yeezy can really pull off a line that seems this obvious and then round it off with "When we walked in the whole room got stil/I Dunno how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal." Post-South Park Kanye would be appauled.
4. "When i come back like Jordan, wearing the 45" - Jay-Z on Encore
Ok normally Jordan is about the laziest basketball reference point you could ask for but this is so far off the mark it's painful. Having retired for 5 minutes Jay did come back and his comback album, Kingdom Come, was far less spectacular than his Heirness's return to his former team in 1995, where he was the difference maker in getting them to the conference championships. Instead Jay's was al imp bloated set of selfindulgent toss, with the exception of the title track, which was a certified banger.
5. "So we rock it like Tracy Macgrady" - The Game on Too Much
Ok normally Jordan is about the laziest basketball reference point you could ask for but this is so far off the mark it's painful. Having retired for 5 minutes Jay did come back and his comback album, Kingdom Come, was far less spectacular than his Heirness's return to his former team in 1995, where he was the difference maker in getting them to the conference championships. Instead Jay's was al imp bloated set of selfindulgent toss, with the exception of the title track, which was a certified banger.
5. "So we rock it like Tracy Macgrady" - The Game on Too Much
It'd be disrespecting The Game to do a top five of name dropping and not include him even if this lines pretty played out.
Now, the only thing I'm left asking is, "Where's all the British rappers referencing basketball flopster and 'only gay in the NBA', John Amaechi?"
Image courtesy of Shaun Wong
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